Just keeping in touch...

I know I have been a touch sporadic lately in blogging :)

I've been having a great time though! My sunburn seems to have tuyrned a bit of a corner so I was in shorts again today

Here are some recent photos...

The moon was breaking through the clouds (*a lightning storm rolled through an hour later), and I took a pic of it and a fire dancer guy.

Water buffalo.

Butterfly

Up the road from the bunglow... I love that rock formation at the top of the hill.

All right... Serious note here. This is Miw, two nights ago. She is from a small village. A local bar had picked up seven or eight women from that village and brought them to Koh Samui to work at the bars. It was her first day and she was scared. As she should be. This is the other end of the spectrum from that little girl I saw in Cambodia. This woman has come here, hoping to meet some rich farang who will take her away, but is willing to sell her body so she can send money to her widowed mother. Her heart is good still, still the innocent.

I paid the bar fine so she could leave for the evening. She wanted to come home with me, but I just bought her a meal at the beach. She wanted one of those small hot air balloons which they send off for good luck (everything here is about good or bad luck). I gave her about half of what she would have earned if she'd gone with a man for the night and took her back to her home.

Last night she was so glad to see me walking by. I stopped and played a couple of stupid four in a row games with her, and repeated what I did the evening before. This time though I sat her down on a log on the beach and talked to her about how I saw she had a good heart, and if she stayed in Samuii there would be men who would hurt her, and soon her heart would be hard too. I asked her to go back to her village, hinted I would pay for the trip. She said she couldn't, she needed the money for her family.

I gave her once again about half what she would have earned from a customer, and told her she was free to do what she liked for the night. She could stay on the beach, or I would take her back to her house, or she could go back to the bar... either way, I was tired and wanted to go to sleep, and no, I did not wish for her to come with me.

We headed back toward the main part of town. A car came around a corner too fast, she was wearing a black dress, nearly invisible in that unlighted section of road. It looked for a moment it would hit her. I scooped her up and jumped to the side of the road. I don't think the guy caught but a glimpse of us. She chattered on and on, mixing Thai and English about the close call.

She was a little confused by my attitude, but in the end, she walked me to the motorcycle, and then turned, headed back to the bar.

I know it was pointless, delaying her introduction into this life by a couple of days... but I was reminded of the story about the little boy and the starfish.

There was a beach covered with thousands of starfish which washed up. An old man was walking down the beach and came across a little boy picking up starfish and throwing them back into the water.

"Why are you doing that?" asked the old man. "Because I want to save them," replied the little boy. The old man laughed.

"There are thousands of starfish here. No matter how hard you work, thousands will die before you can reach them. You can't possibly make a difference."

The little boy picked up a starfish and threw it into the water, "I made a difference to that one."

What Miw needs is an education, skills. I wish I could do more than hit the pause button in her life for two days and try to talk her into returning home. If you would, pause and say a prayer for Miw and women like her.

This place makes me smile. It is run by two middle aged cousins, well perhaps a little more than middle aged. They sell fruit, milkshakes (foreground), souvenirs, and gasoline. I try to buy shakes there everyday.

This is Phailin who runs that little store; she's wearing my hat. She is a crack up. She always overdresses, and tries to talk like an old time movie star...

"Hello Dahling! Let me get you a nice piece of Thai fruit, Dahling... Would you like to buy some gas-sooo-leen Dahling?"

-----------------------

On a personal note... I am having the time of my life. I am seeing wonderful things, horrid things, ancient things, different customs, beauty, cruelty, good and evil.

I am also seeing myself more clearly than ever before. I haven't had a week to myself in over thirty years... and now I'm having over four. And... And... I am seeing myself feel good about who I am... what I believe and what I am willing to do, and what I am not willing to do.

For the last three decades I have been one half of a couple, not so much an individual. I see how unhealthy it had become, I had become. How codependent I was.

But now she is gone, and I find I am quite happy making my own choices, living my life without input from someone who, in the end, did not have my interests at heart.

This trip has been a blessing.

Sabbath

Everyone (I think) has heard all about the sabbath... setting aside one day a week for rest.

And we've heard about the over legalization of it when Jesus was criticised for his disciples doing small tasks on that day...

It's why we have weekends (sort of... some time we might discuss Otto Von Bismarck). The idea is pretty simple... do your best, work hard, take a break.

Many of us are busy on Sundays (or whichever day you take a break) anyway. We don't always punch the time card, but we still fill the day with all sorts of chores. Stuff comes up:

Then he asked them, "If one of you has a son or an ox that falls into a well on the Sabbath day, will you not immediately pull him out?" Luke 14:5

Nothing wrong with that.

Over the last few years I have let my mind and heart wind up pretty tight. I won't recount the events here, but I will say that even when a day of rest rolled around each week my heart did not rest.

I'm resting now.

The other day someone asked what day it was. I didn't know. I had to look it up.

Whoo hoo!

I'm still getting used to it.

Consider what it is like when a pain ceases. When a thorn is pulled, when a headache fades, when the novacain numbers a throbbing tooth. The cessation of pain can be more than the pain simply stopping, there can be a sense of pleasure.

That is what this vacation is like. I have tried to fix what was broken in my life, worked hard, long on it, and forgot who I was. I did not enjoy my life, even when I thought I was enjoying it. I see now that even when I lifted my foot from the thorns, I did not pull them all out.

Bottom line... I feel like this month has been a sabbath for my life.

It feels like a blessing. It feels like I have been told to just sit on a rock for a while and simply rest. It feels like... it feels like something I've not known.

It feels wonderful.

Mellow Drama

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh...

Check it out! This post isn't about unfaithul spouses or faithful views on God and science, but just about... (wait for it...) FUN!

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... what day of the week is it? What is the date? Let me look...

Aah! It's Thursday the 25th of June... 2:40 in the afternoon local time, Koh Samui, Thailand.

Now, isn't that cool?!

I've done it! I've relaxed to the point where I have to look up the date and day!!!

So I thought I'd throw some photos on the blog pile and let you fine folks see that Ol' CS is learning how to smile again (my cheeks hurt!).

I've loaded the pics below, and now I'll put some captions on them, and publish!

This guy is pretty cool. He is using a wooden mallet and an old chisel to carve this huge piece of wood. I came back later and took a closer photo which you can see further down.

Here's the bungalow where I stay... It's very nice. I asked Poi (more about her in a moment) why Thai houses are on stilts. Apparently it discourages snakes from coming in. I hear there are 170 types of snakes in Thailand, but only 50 are venomous!

This is Poi (pronounce Poo - eeeeeee). She takes care of the bungalow. She washes my clothes, fixes meals, cleans house, and tells me not to bow because I am a man and a teacher and such people do not bow as I have been doing. She won't eat with me. She says that a woman eats only after the man has eaten all he wants. She's adamant about it, and I'm not going to be able to reshape this culture to my views... so... I eat what I want, then she eats. She thinks I like red wine, so she bought a bottle for me today.

I told her about this blog. She was embarrassed and excited when I told her I'd put her picture here. She said that maybe some rich farang would see it and come to Thailand to be her boyfriend.

Typical scene here. Go around a corner and there's a temple framed with trees and the ocean nearby.

OK... I have no idea what this is about... but it is some sort of temple shaped like a boat sitting in a pool.

Another view of it.

Some stulpas. They stretch off into the jungle in both directions. I described them in greater detail in a previous post.

Another typical scene here.

Alright... this was cool... that is me flying along a cable strung up in the jungle high up on a mountain. There were ten cables set up, connecting platforms in the trees.

Coming in for a landing!

A few things about this pic:

1. I'm really high up (I'd guess 60 feet) and that is as close to the edge of the platform as I could make myself go... harness or no.
2. The view is just amazing!
3. I got a sunburn on those pale Oregonian legs. I'm not just white, I'm dang near transluscent!
4. I have GOT to watch my weight! (Which is difficult with all the wonderful food here!)

OK this and the next two photos were taken in rapid succession. This cable is 160 meters long. Since it was the last one, I thought I'd build up some speed. Now the braking system is very simple. One lets the cable slide through one's gloved hand... when you wish to stop, squeeze the cable!

I figured I would get going really fast and then I could pull really really hard and stop quickly.

Nope! I came flying in way above any safe speed. I realized I would need to use the emergency braking system, which is... put your feet out in front of you to absorb the impact! I'm awful glad those bags stuffed with plastic were there!

The guy who owns the property here is building a restaurant. I thought this pool with fish overlooking the Samui horizon was beautiful.

Poi brought out an English/Thai dictionary and had me look up the Thai foods I like. Then she made this meal. Panang Curry with shrimp, squid, and some sort of mystery meat (I think it was beef).

Here's the close up of that carving I mentioned above.

Here's the Big Buddha everyone talks about. The flight path of all the planes is directly above it. 15 flights in and out every day.

There are other gigantic figures here as well... I asked my dad's girlfriend, Chicken, who this deity was... she couldn't remember. 18 arms! She'd be handy picking the cherries off my trees!

Very bright colors!

I guess this is the Thai version of Neptune in the foreground... human scale... The figure in the background is a touch larger.

So... there it is... a few pics from some of my travels the last couple of days.

I wanted to share these sights, but there is a more important point... I'm having fun! I'm becoming relaxed... and just feel confident and good about things.

I miss my home, I miss my sons, I miss my chruch and my friends... but... this has been very, very, very good for me.

Aaaaaaaahhh...

Wrote this last night:

Doing great with my Dad. Haven''t spent this much time with him ever. His health could be better...

Poi bought me local fruit...

The bungalow where I am staying on Koh Samui

Nation of Orphans

This is a beautiful place.

I bit warm for an Oregonian, but not too much so.


The rice fields are really taking off, people are still planting... and it is so very green.


The skies fill with thunderheads every afternoon, lightning dances across the sky...


There is history here... written in stone... and written in the absence of the elderly.

I have been dropped into Southeast Asia, immersed in a new environment, surrounded by a different culture, and it has been beautiful and fascinating and horrid.

It has been a profound experience for me. It is something I shall never forget.

Much of it has been quite fun. I have joined the foreigners in dining and enjoying the exotic, though I am embarrassed by my fellow world travelers who ignore the hurtful truth and have taken advantage of poverty.

But I'm getting ahead of myself...

Let me show you some of my day today.


Look closely at the above photograph. There are three buildings here I wish to discuss. One on the left edge, one in the center, and the third to the far right, just to the other side of the buses.


This is the building from the left. It is a fairly new temple set on the foundations of a temple built nearly a thousand years ago. Within are murals and an altar surrounded with smooth clean stone.


I was offered an incense for the buddha enthroned within. I did not wish to offend my hosts. So... I knelt and I prayed:

"Heavenly Father... Creator of all things... I kneel within this man made temple, built to honor an illusion, and I see it is no more than a thing... plaster and stone and gold... And I know that you see clearly through this mirage of confusion people have constructed here... I know You are the maker of all things, and I know Your heart aches for these people. I pray, Lord... bless these people, help them Lord and lift them from their misery, help them to draw near to You. I praise You O Lord God. Bless my sons, bless my home, bless my nation, bless this nation, help all of us Lord, from those who have never heard of you to those who have but do not listen. Accept my offering of praise, Lord. Thank you for all You have done for me... I am Yours Lord. Bid me and I will obey..."

This building was a high school at the same time I was in high school. I graduated in 1974. In 1975 the Kmer Rouge rolled into this place, and this became a prison. Not the sort of prison where people served time and were sent away after their punishment. In this prison men and women were chained to the floor, and in a week or so, after dying of thirst, their bodies were dragged into the courtyard and thrown into the well.

This distresses me. While I was adventuring, hitchiking along the West Coast, hiking through Yosemite, blithely enjoying the senseless, carefree life of a teen in a land where I was free to do as I please... people lay here, their tongues thickening... dying. I do not know enough about the truth of the history of this time when I was off being irresponsible. That will change. I will learn of this and remember.

These are stulpas. They are common throughout Southeast Asia. Many families have several on their lands. Within them are urns holding the ashes of their loved ones. It is their form of a graveyard.

There is a special stulpa here. One with glass walls to show the world what happened here.


This stulpa stands as a monument, the details described for suddenly sobered tourists.

Somnang, my dtuk dtuk driver asked if I wanted to have my picture taken here. I was tempted to tell him no. This isn't something to get a photo of so one has a souvenir of the exotic to show the folks back home. But...

But... in memory of those who suffered here, I can do the small distasteful act of placing myself in a photo, a recognition that I live, that I enjoyed life while this had happened. I took my hat off. I did not smile. I sat for the photo.


After the Kmer Rouge had been routed, after the the horror, people came here, emptied the well of those bones, and placed them gently behind these panes of glass.


It disgusts me.

It makes my heart ache to think of the suffering...

Somnang took me to the Cambodia War Museum.



Above this flag of the Kmer Rouge are a few uniforms of who opposed them. If you look closely you will see the holes in the fabric, the blood stains.


And this... this is so horrid I can barely tap these words into this keyboard. These rifles, made by mighty nations, represent great evil. Do you see the bayonets?

Snake venom was spread on those blades. Infants were tossed into the air and speared with them. There is a tree nearby famous for the thousands of babies who were smashed against its trunk.

Oh... It aches just to write these words. But avoiding such words, ignoring such evil truths, is wrong. In this beautiful land... I see why 50% of those in this country are younger than 21.

It is easy to look the other way.

I was told I was the first westerner to have come here in days. Many others here are enjoying the food and women and spectacles, but don't come down the narrow road to witness what evil can do.


I was shown many things here. All sorts of weapons. Guns that could hit targets 27 kilometers away.

The man who started this museum served in this war, served the Kmer Rouge. He was shackled and led with others to that prison above, and an officer asked if any of them could drive a tank. He said he could. They told him he would drive that tank, the one in the next photo, until, as he was told, they won the war. He survived by joining those who killed his friends and neighbors.


He had stopped the tank to relieve himself, and his friend moved the tank on a bit further to get a better view of the terrain. An anti tank mine destroyed that tank. Killed his friend. That is his friend's thigh bone on the tank. Finger bones are to the right.


There was a sample mine field there. Even over the short grass the trip wire was nearly impossible to see.


There was a good representation of types of land mines.... Bouncing Bettys, anti-personnel, claymores, anti-tank.


The war still claims victims. My guide, Kohn, helped his family when he was a little boy by dragging bits of metal home to be sold as scrap. He was told they could not be hurt because his father had a special tattoo across his back, a dedication to the gods who would protect him and his family.

One day one of those pieces of mechanical evil killed his father, his mother, his brother, his sister, took his arm.

There wasn't much in the way of medicine to help him. Someone cut the stump clean. He still carries shrapnel around his heart, bits of metal which ache in cold weather.

His father's family came, and since there was no one else to claim the land, they sent Kohn to the monks. After a while the monks sent him to a Christian school which taught him English.

He says no one will hire him because tourists don't want to see cripples. He says no girl will go out with him. He says the only things he has left are a determination to tell the world the truth of his history, mostly to his community, people too young to know it first hand, and his faith in the Christian God who despises the evil men do.

This is a horrid post. It describes things which turn my stomach.

I recall the young girl yesterday... probably not yet 12, who was angry because I would not step into the role of one more abuser in her life.

This is a beautiful land. This is a place where people smile and hope the farangs from far away will leave some of their wealth. This is a place where most are too young to know fully the horrors that happened here, and those fortunate few who survived avoid speaking of it.

I don't think this experience will seem to change much of who I am, what I do when I return to my home in the Willamette Valley. But I think, it will be something that will help me to be just a little more fervent in worshiping my God, a little more focused on my students, the children I am charged to instruct, a little more grateful for all the blessings which have flowed over me all my life.

I won't forget this nation of orphans.